Madison Traits

Oh they are lovely. Let's name a few that pertain to me.

cankles(check)
large arms(check)
soft hearted(check)
emotional(check and due to the above)
bad feet(although I got my mom's cute tiny feet, the bottoms occasionally cause me trouble, but it's been years)
small, deep veins(check)
love of food(check)
hate exercise(check)

Although all of these are just lovely, I want to focus on the last one. I am unable to think of a single aunt, uncle, cousin or sibling that loves exercise, or even likes it. Oh wait there is one. And she's even made a career of it. I envy that. She's an oddity. There are 23 of us. Plus 21 spouses that I don't like it any better but they have other people to blame for that. I may be wrong on some of the spouses by possibly 4, but for that number it hardly matters. One in 44 is really not good. (Family...If I'm wrong about that number, please correct me so I can dislike you for liking it). :) Most of us struggle with our weight as a result of the last two mentioned above.
That being said, I know it's necessary, especially since I have back problems. I am now back on the wagon since falling off when River joined us. It's amazing that just three months without it makes me feel so weak when I start again. But I've met my goal for two weeks now. I will slowly increase the amount I exercise but if I go in gung hoe, 7 days a week, I burn out really quick and then months will go by again. I just wish the more I did it the more I liked it. It even makes me feel better. I don't think it's a coincidence that my best days this week have been those that I've exercised. But that's still not enough to make me like it. Not. Even. A. Little. So just know that when I say I've exercised, it's a BIG deal! :) And you can all feel sorry for me. ;)

Today after I picked Flower up from preschool I got out my favorite exercise video. We did it together. It was really fun, and she burned out before I did! That video was a large part of the reason that I lost 60 pounds in 2004. Yes 60. That's a big number. I actually lost that in just 5 months. Because of such a quick loss, I gained back about 20 by the end of 2005. But have kept the other 40 off, give or take at certain points, since then. I could easily lose another 60 and not look emaciated. However I'd be really happy losing that 20 I gained back and I'd be happy with myself. But what would make me even more happy would be at any weight, no matter what the number, and stay there! Feel good. Feel healthy. Have a healthy relationship with all of it. I lost all that weight the old fashioned way too. Eating right and exercising. Granted, it was much easier then because I didn't work that year. I guess I did since I watched Ashton at home but he was a new born so it was 'easy'. My life revolved around healthy food and exercise. Every waking moment. I think that's why I burned myself out and gained some back. It's about balance and not depriving myself of every little thing or it gets ugly. This is so difficult for me.
But I'm back on the wagon and feeling good, most days. ;)

Oh and thanks for all the lovely traits I received Dad! Although you received them from someone else so it's not entirely your fault. :)