Sweet Becky.

My sweet cousin Becky lost her battle with Cystic Fibrosis today. She will be missed. She's been sick most of her life so it's not a surprise, yet I was surprised. I guess because she's been in and out of the hospital all my life, I thought she'd leave this time too. She was a fighter and I didn't expect anything less this time. But she was tired. And she was missing her best friend. She is an amazing example of fighting until the end. She had to fight her entire life. However for most of her life she didn't fight alone. Laying next to her in what was their second home, the hospital, was her younger brother Perrin. He lost his battle at a much younger age of 25. They layed in hospital beds side by side their entire lives when they had to have treatments. They went to CF camps together. They were each others best friend and biggest fan. Fighting for the last 7 years without him has no doubt been the hardest part of her life. She told me a couple of years ago that losing him was like losing a limb. It crippled her. They were rarely apart. And they were the only ones in their lives that truly understood what the other was going through. She was alone even with so much family surrounding her. I get so emotional thinking of the reunion they are no doubt having right now. She has meant so much to me throughout my life. Every time we would visit her, whether she was feeling good and running around with the best of us, in the hospital having another treatment, or hooked up to machines at home, she was always spunky and laughing. In the hospital she would pretend to be cranky about the nurses just to make us all laugh. She told me at a young age that my eyes could not be brown because brown is not pretty. My eyes were pretty and therefore they were milk chocolate. I have forever thought of my eyes as milk chocolate. Every time she saw me, even last year when she was meeting Flower for the first time, she asked me what color my eyes were. It was a fun endearing thing for us. I have also told Flower that her eyes are dark chocolate, since they are almost black after all. It makes me think of Becky every time and that will have even greater meaning to me now. She was told at a young age that she wouldn't live past her teens, and then she did. Then they said she wouldn't live to 20. And she did. They said she wouldn't live long enough to get married. And she did. They said she wouldn't live long enough to have kids and that even if she did, her body couldn't handle it. And she did. She has two beautiful daughters. And they've seen her fight and they know how strong she is. She surpassed everything they said she couldn't do, living 36 years of life to the fullest. She was only 4 'years' older then me but it was a lifetime. She had her first daughter at twenty who is now 16. Because of all she's gone through in life she seemed much more like one of my older, doting aunts. Our relationship was not at all the same as the relationship I have with my other cousins of her age. I actually can't even believe she was only 4 years older then me and I didn't realize it until I was writing this. She was beyond her years.
She was strong. She was loving. She was a champion.
I will miss her.
See you on the flip side Becky!